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“Some people haven’t seen another person in months”

Connecting people with learning disabilities, dating project Happily has been busier than ever throughout the pandemic.

Connecting people with learning disabilities, dating project Happily has been busier than ever throughout the pandemic. But it’s meeting a need that’s been pressing for years, says founder Helena Reed. Hammersmith United Charities has funded 10 memberships to support the project.

“My daughter has always felt ‘different to everyone else’, says Alison,* mother of Lucy,* who has a learning disability. “She went through months of non-stop crying – she was so down. It was very sad to see.” Lucy desperately wanted to meet new people and build relationships, but she didn’t have the confidence or skills – and didn’t know where to get help.

According to Helena Reed, founder of Happily, a Hammersmith-based dating and friendship project for people with learning disabilities and autism, new members often talk about this sense of helpless isolation. “Members often feel stuck between two worlds. They don’t want to be stuck in a box labelled ‘learning disabilities’. They just want to feel cool and have fun with their friends.”

Helena knows this first-hand. Her younger sister has learning disabilities, and growing up Helena tried to help her arrange dates and acted as a chaperone. “But it was really hard to find the right environment for my sister to meet people,” says Helena. “The mainstream dating apps just didn’t feel safe or appropriate, and there wasn’t anything tailored to people with a learning disability.”

It’s a common problem: over the age of 25, people with learning disabilities stop getting support from their local authority’s special educational needs system. Many finish college and find they are too old to access free services they had relied on for social interaction. The sudden loss of this network can be devastating.

With 1 in 3 young people with a learning disability spending less than 1 hour outside their home on a typical Saturday, research suggests that people with a learning disability are also seven times as likely as their non-disabled peers to be lonely.

“Although there are some amazing charities in each borough supporting adults with learning disabilities,” says Helena, “it can be a small world. If you don’t fancy someone in your local group, you are quite stuck.”

Bringing Happily to life

Seeing a pressing need for something to connect vulnerable young adults – and with her little sister in mind – Helena took the plunge and launched Happily three years ago. The project creates a safe place for making new friends and starting relationships. The focus is on dating, but Happily believes that helping friendships along is just as important. The service operates across nine boroughs in west London, and free annual memberships have been funded for ten people by Hammersmith United Charities.

So how does it work? First of all, the Happily team get to know members, their family and support staff. They find out about the member’s hopes and interests, relationship history and support needs. Practicalities are considered in a social way, like understanding whether members can travel independently, manage money and read menus. Goals are set to revisit later on: “New members often feel nervous; many haven’t had relationships before,” says Helena, “so it’s all about working on confidence.”

After being matched with another like-minded member, they might go to a park or café with a chaperone – although during the pandemic these meetings are usually online. Afterwards, the process is managed by Happily, so no one shares phone numbers until they’ve both decided they want to meet again. “It’s a supported situation where people can have a good time,” says Helena. “It takes the pressure off. Our aim is to remove risk and make sure everyone is safe.”

“If a relationship does develop, we still keep in touch,” says Helena. “Adults with learning disabilities often need support to nurture relationships, and things can change. We help at each stage – with the struggles and the break ups. We’re there for all of it. And if relationships progress to being physical, we make sure they’ve got the right information at the right time,” she says.

For some people, sex education in school can feel like a distant memory. Happily explores this with members in an appropriate way, working with parents and support staff to enable healthy relationships. Collaborating with experts like SASH and Respond, they provide 1:1 support and workshops about sex and relationship, boundaries, consent and sexual health.

Connecting over lockdown

Covid-19 has changed the way Happily provides its services, but the need for human connection is greater than ever. It can be even more difficult for people with learning disabilities to know how to keep in touch when they can’t meet up in person.

“We’re checking in now more than ever,” says Helena. “In the first lockdown, we got in touch with a couple who had been together for a year. They just didn’t know what to do or how to connect. So we got them up and running on Zoom and helped them have a birthday celebration online, which got the ball rolling for them.”

“It’s difficult to reach people and get new members at the moment,” says Helena, “but we know how much need there is. When we do manage to connect with new people, they are desperate for contact. Some haven’t seen another person for months. So we try to link them up with online group socials as quickly as we can. It’s good for people to see some smiley, happy faces on the screen – so suddenly they aren’t sitting at home alone. There are people out there who can give support.”

Life beyond Happily

Happily has been life changing for Lucy. As Helena says: “Before she joined us, Lucy hadn’t really met new people and was very nervous. Through her new experiences her friendship group has grown so much. Now she’s had two relationships, and she’s been to the seaside with her friends. Her mum says that she’s is a different person, and that she’s so much more confident.”

It’s not always an easy journey. “It’s a rollercoster. You want to be there for members as much as possible, so you can get very emotional. If there is a break-up, I feel involved. But sometimes I cry with happiness. It’s such a nice feeling, when someone becomes more confident. I get very touched by the responses of family members,” says Helena.

“I try to take things day by day. But sometimes it’s overwhelming to think about what we’re trying to achieve with Happily. I just threw myself into the project without really considering the scale of what was involved. I was just thinking about my sister being lonely. But she isn’t now.”

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Happily – free memberships available now

Happily has free memberships for people over 18 with a learning disability available, and is as active as ever over the pandemic. If you know of anyone the scheme may help, please share.

Happily is particularly keen to reach women with learning disabilities or autism, to keep the gender ratios equal. The team are also searching for LGBT+ members.

Happily supports people living in Brent, Ealing, Hammersmith & Fulham, Kensington & Chelsea, Richmond upon Thames, Wandsworth, Hounslow, Westminster and Harrow.

Contact hello@happilydating.co.uk for more information or sign up here

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*Names have been changed.

Flats are now available in our almshouses

If you think you might be eligible, we'd be happy to give you a tour of our almshouses and share what it's like to live here.

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Trustee vacancy

Could you be our new Trustee?

Make a meaningful difference to the people of Hammersmith.

We’re appointing a new Trustee, who will also join our Grants and Community Committee. This is a unique opportunity to join an established charity that combines housing, grant-making and community leadership.

We’re particularly keen to hear from people with a strong connection to Hammersmith or lived experience of the challenges faced by our community. You do not need to have been a Trustee before as we’ll provide full training and support.

You’ll attend eight meetings a year, (typically 90 minutes each, starting at 5.30pm) and be welcomed at other events. While it’s a voluntary role, we will reimburse reasonable travel expenses.

Please download the Candidate Information Pack for full details. The closing date is 17 June 2026. If you’re unsure whether this role is right for you, we’re happy to have an informal discussion before you apply.

We believe in a Hammersmith where everyone feels valued, supported, and empowered – a community where everyone has the opportunity to thrive.

Will you join us in making our vision a reality?

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A group of smiling children at the Sulgrave club

Celebrating Hammersmith’s communities through film

We commissioned Media Trust and Constellation Films to create short videos highlighting the work of four of our grant holders.

Life is difficult for many people in Hammersmith right now. It’s a challenge to afford the bare essentials. ‘Nice-to-haves’ are out of reach, even when they could make life easier in the long run. Charities are facing a similar issue. When core costs are high and teams are stretched, there’s little to no money available for marketing or communications.

At Hammersmith United Charities, we aim to do more than fund good work – we champion community organisations and raise awareness of the issues they’re tackling. With this in mind, we commissioned Media Trust and Constellation Films to create short videos highlighting the work of four of our grant holders: Sulgrave Youth Club, This New Ground, Barons Court Project and Nourish Hub.

You can watch the videos below.

We also funded Hikayetna to produce Arabic-language mental health videos, responding directly to local insight about the barriers faced by our Arabic-speaking communities when it comes to seeking mental health support.

The five organisations each came with their own priorities – reaching new beneficiaries, raising funds, attracting volunteers, changing attitudes – but collectively, these films go even further. They help to build a richer, more visible picture of the strength and diversity of Hammersmith. It’s a community we can, and should, be proud of, and one that deserves our support.

You can watch Hikayetna’s films here.

Film screening

On 17 March 2026, we gathered at Riverside Studios for a community screening to showcase the films, celebrate the work of the filmmakers, and bring local people together to spark new connections and open the door to future collaboration across Hammersmith.

 

People gathering around the food table at the film screening

One of the films being shown in the cinema

Hetty and Paige checking names against the register

If you would like to stay up to date with future events, please scroll to the bottom of the page to sign up to our newsletter.

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Ken, a man in his 60s, standing by a trug full of plants and surrounded by pots of plants

Happy National Gardening Week!

Why our communal gardens are integral to almshouse life

The theme for this year’s National Gardening Week is ‘Share your passion for plants’. Whether you’re an avid gardener or just enjoy relaxing on a bench surrounded by colour and birdsong, most people enjoy being outside in spring. As our Community Gardener, Victoria Cripps (known as V), says, “As a Community Gardener, it is very important to me to advocate for gardening as a means of supporting wellbeing. I know, through my own daily experience, that being in nature and caring for plants and wildlife has a positive effect on my mental and physical health. Gardening is both physical exercise and a mindful, focused, creative activity.

“The residents here comment daily on the effect the garden has on their wellbeing – from particular plants evoking positive memories, to hearing birdsong and feeling joy, seeing colour and feeling uplifted, and experiencing the pride of new seedlings emerging! Those who actively garden also comment on how it supports them to stay active, as well as the enjoyment of focusing on a project and the sense of achievement in seeing a patch flourish.”

Indeed, many of our residents enjoy gardening. Some are life-long gardeners, while others have discovered their passion later in life.

Ken, a man in his 60s, standing by a trug full of plants and surrounded by pots of plants
Ken with his trug garden

One of our residents, Ken, says, “I had what you’d call a concrete garden before. I’d never done gardening in my life, apart from tomatoes and a bit of veg. I’d never grown flowers until I came to Sycamore.”

Ken moved here back in 2023 and soon started helping with the communal garden. Before long, he had his own trug outside the greenhouse and then took on one of the almshouse’s small plots of land. Along with bedding plants, Ken is now growing fruit and vegetables, including tomatoes, radishes, spring onions and rhubarb.

Rather than learning from books, Ken has learnt as he’s gone along: “The gardeners have been advising me on what to do and showing me little bits and pieces – when to put the seeds in and so on. I’ve been picking things up that way. One or two of the other residents have been helping me too.”

While his own plot keeps Ken pretty busy, he still enjoys helping with what he terms “the donkey work” in the communal garden, including painting and repairing our garden benches. He’s now in the process of making his own bench out of old car tires and pallet wood. Next on his list is repurposing more discarded tires into a decorative planter in the shape of a garden well.

His advice to anyone thinking of trying gardening is, “Just get on and do it!”

Gardening in later life

Ken, a man in his 60s, gardening from a chair.

Ken has difficulties with his knees so has bought himself a low fold-up chair to use when he can’t kneel.

V has a few other tips for gardening in your 70, 80s and beyond…

  • If you have mobility issues, the right tools can make gardening a lot easier. Look for lightweight ones that can be used standing up or from a chair, such as long-handled weed pullers. You can also buy easy grip handles, which attach to your existing tools and are really useful if you have painful or weak wrists.
  • If you find it difficult to kneel or crouch, you might want to consider having some raised beds built or investing in a large trug or some pots. They’re much easier to maintain, as you can tend to them while standing or sitting in a chair. Do bear in mind that they’ll need watering more often though.
  • Choose low-maintenance plants, such as shrubs that don’t need tying in or deadheading. Plant perennials and bulbs rather than annuals to make your life simpler next spring. Wallflowers, sedums and begonias are all great choices.
  • You’ll enjoy your garden more if you feel safe in it. Make sure that paths are wide and even, with no raised slabs that might trip you up. Mobility aids, such as grab rails, can also help you to access your garden, especially if it’s on a different level to your home.
  • Full watering cans are very heavy and hosepipes can be challenging to pull around. As our climate changes, we can expect more dry, hot spells throughout summer, so you may want to opt for drought-tolerant plants like lavenders, salvias and verbenas.
  • If you love gardening but can’t manage a garden on your own, then volunteering on a shared plot might be the answer. Many of our almshouse residents enjoy working in our communal gardens. If you’re not a resident, you could volunteer with Hammersmith Community Gardens Association, which manages several gardens across the borough. You don’t need any gardening experience to volunteer as you’ll be supported by other volunteers and staff members.
  • Having benches and seating in your garden means you can take regular breaks. Gardening, at any time of life, is about pacing. It’s much better to spend as long as you can comfortably on an achievable task, then refresh with a cup of tea before moving on, than trying to do it all at once!
  • For times when it’s really difficult to get outdoors, due to challenging weather or mobility needs, looking after houseplants or arranging cut flowers means you can connect with nature indoors. There are houseplants for all ranges of ability, so you can start with something easy and move on to more challenging plants as you grow in confidence.
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Bubble & Squeak's brightly coloured logo, painted by the children

Bubble & Squeak

How a project started by school kids now feeds hundreds of people in Hammersmith.

April 22nd is Earth Day. When we think of climate change, we tend to blame petrol cars or factories churning out cheap clothes, but almost a third of greenhouse gas emissions are due to  food production. Agriculture is also responsible for around 70% of water use, not to mention leading to deforestation, biodiversity loss and pollution.

Reducing food waste, then, could play a crucial role in tackling climate change and many other environmental issues.

Almost 2 million tonnes of food is currently wasted in London each year. At the same time, more than 10% of Londoners are experiencing food insecurity, with tens of thousands relying on food banks to feed themselves and their families.

Back in 2017, a group of children at Old Oak Primary School decided to take a stand.

Bubble & Squeak's brightly coloured logo, painted by the childrenLydia Gandaa, Director of Bubble & Squeak, explains, “The children were shocked to find out how much food was being wasted. They asked Waitrose and Marks and Spencer’s if they could collect any food that would otherwise have been thrown away. They also pitched what is now the Mayor’s Fund for London and won £1,500, which they used to set up a weekly food stall in the school playground. East Acton/Old Oak is a highly deprived area, so it was about supporting the families that live locally to access healthy, quality food that would have otherwise gone to waste.”

Almost 10 years later, that project, Bubble & Squeak, is now a community interest company (CIC), feeding hundreds of people every week. Most of the food is provided by City Harvest and The Felix Project, who collect it from supermarkets across London.

Bubble & Squeak’s food stall is open three days a week. It’s still in the playground but in a separate space with its own gate, so that members of the community can also access it. The stall is mainly staffed by volunteers, with the help of older pupils after school.

Lydia says, “We have a wide range of individuals coming for food, including older residents, families and people who live by themselves. Each session is attended by around 60 to 70 people, and they’re often using the food to feed several people in a household.”

The food is given out for free, but if people are able to make a donation, then the money is given to the school to spend on toys and equipment.

As well as distributing food that would otherwise be wasted, Bubble & Squeak runs an after-school cookery club, showing children how to make healthy meals and minimise waste. The CIC also organises community meals and holiday activities.

Hammersmith United Charities’ grant

Many of East Acton and Old Oak’s residents work full-time but in low-paid jobs. Lydia says, “They work during the day so can’t get to our morning or afternoon sessions, but they’re struggling to make ends meet and need support. It isn’t fair.”

Hammersmith United Charities agreed to provide Bubble & Squeak with a grant of £15,000, which it’s using to run evening sessions twice a week for the rest of the year.


Support Bubble & Squeak

Do you have a few hours spare each week to give out food or run cookery sessions? Please email Lydia at bubblesqueakeat@gmail.com

 

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