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Residents’ stories

Bill, John Betts House

I used to live in a bedsit just around the corner from here in Rylett Avenue. I’d walk past John Betts House every day and think, That looks like a nice place to live. I never dreamed I’d live here myself. John Betts House has got everything you could want. When I wake up in the morning, the sun comes streaming in through the big windows. There are huge gardens right outside, and you can smell the flowers in my room.  Things are a bit different at the moment. But this feels like one of the safest places in London. Read Bill’s story here

Stella, John Betts House

I loved my flat from the first time I saw it, and I still do. The beautiful garden is a bonus, a retreat from the traffic outside. I cannot imagine living anywhere else. My family has lived in Hammersmith for two hundred years, although I think I am the last one still living here. I was born in the original Queen Charlottes Hospital, just across the road from John Betts House so I have not moved far. 

Kitty, Sycamore House

In 2012 I came here to Sycamore House. That feeling when you come in – you felt it was going to be a place you could feel proud to live in. I liked the care that came along with your flat, that someone came to check on you in the morning, and a cleaner tended to the place. Everyone was very kindly and the gardens were lovely. My daughter described the communal lounge as something you’d see on a cruise ship! Read Kitty’s story here

Resident, Sycamore House

“Every day I wake up and think how lucky I am. It’s so nice to be comfortable – I love it here. After years of bedlamit’s so quiet and peaceful. It’s great having my own space, and the people are really nice. My son’s really happy about where I live now and he knows I’m settled. He doesn’t have to worry anymore.”  

Clodagh, John Betts House

“The biggest transformation of my life. To have reached this age and have this wonderful, wonderful garden.”


Find out more 

Want to find out more about living in an almshouse?

If you think you might be eligible, we'd be happy to give you a tour of our almshouses and share what it's like to live here.

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Woman giving talk on domestic abuse to other women

Mental health trauma is the unseen side of domestic abuse

Women who experience domestic abuse are twice as likely to experience depression as those who don’t.

UNiTE to End Violence against Women is an annual campaign led by the UN. The campaign kicks off on 25th November – the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women – and runs until Human Rights Day on 10th December.

Most violence against women is committed by the woman’s husband or other intimate partner.  It happens in every country across the globe; 1.4 million women in the UK experience domestic abuse each year and, on average, one woman is killed by a male partner or ex-partner every week.

However, even more worrying are stats from the UK’s police chiefs – which point to more women affected by domestic abuse taking their own lives than were murdered by a partner or former partner. Yet there is very little awareness of or discussion around what is arguably a secondary and largely invisible impact on women.

That’s where organisations like Woman’s Trust come in. Set up almost 30 years ago, Woman’s Trust has an exclusive and specialist focus on providing free mental health care to address the trauma caused by domestic abuse and the effect this has on women in their daily lives – often going undiagnosed for years, sometimes even decades after the relationship has ended.

Woman giving talk on domestic abuse to other womenWoman’s Trust has received a number of grants from us since 2012. The London-based charity has supported tens of thousands of women with free therapy and counselling and has been a literal lifesaver for women at some of the most desperate times of their lives.

A client of Woman’s Trust shared, “My experience getting help and support from Woman’s Trust was invaluable. I was not in a good place and didn’t know that I was in an abusive relationship for all those years and what was abusive about it. When it’s psychological abuse, it’s very difficult to decipher. WT helped me to see things and to understand what was happening to me, which made me understand why I have been feeling so depressed for so many years.”

Rachel Prescott-Smith is Head of Fundraising at Woman’s Trust. She told us, ‘‘Domestic abuse still carries shame and stigma (which it shouldn’t) and as a result, many women don’t like to talk about it, and worryingly some don’t even recognise their experiences as abuse. Most people also don’t really consider the resulting trauma and mental health issues that experiencing domestic abuse can cause, even though one in two women’s suicide attempts are linked to their experiences of abuse. Raising awareness is so important, as it helps survivors know they are not alone, and that help is out there.”

According to Rachel, there are still many misconceptions around domestic abuse, from what it entails to how likely it is to happen and the way it affects survivors on a practical and emotional level. Many people don’t realise that the term ‘domestic abuse’ covers a wide range of abusive behaviour, from physical violence to economic control and psychological abuse.

Women who experience domestic abuse are twice as likely to experience depression as those who don’t, and it can take a long time to process the trauma – or even recognise that mental health challenges are caused by domestic abuse. Counselling is invaluable, but it’s difficult to access on the NHS and even more rare to get specialists who understand the unique ways in which survivors are affected, which is why charities like Woman’s Trust are so important.

Rachel shares, “If you’ve experienced domestic abuse and live in one of the areas that we work in, we can offer you up to 18 sessions with a counsellor. You’ll see the same counsellor, at the same time each week, so that you can build rapport and feel more comfortable. Sessions are completely confidential and can be online or face-to-face in a women-only setting.”


Get support

If you’re experiencing (or have experienced) domestic abuse, and you want to find out about counselling sessions in London, contact Woman’s Trust on:

(Office hours: Mon-Fri, 9:30am – 5pm)

If you want to make a professional referral for someone under your care or supervision, call Woman’s Trust on 020 7034 0303.

For immediate advice or support, please call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247.

Angelou is a partnership of West Central London services that support women and girls affected by domestic violence and abuse. You can call Angelou for free on 0808 801 0660, email angelou@advancecharity.org.uk or visit www.angelou.org to find out more.

If you’re a man experiencing domestic abuse, call Respect’s Men’s Advice Line on 0808 8010327, email info@mensadviceline.org.uk or visit www.mensadviceline.org.uk. The ManKind charity can also help you to escape an abusive situation.

 

 

 

 

 

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Two people dancing. One is a woman. The other is an older man, dressed in a red service uniform and wearing medals.

Reducing loneliness at Christmas

The H&F Big Christmas Day Lunch

Three women smiling at the camera, One is wearing reindeer horns and a Christmas jumper.  The others are in party hats.If someone you know is aged 60+ and likely to be alone on Christmas Day, please tell them about the H&F Big Christmas Day Lunch. Up to 500 people will celebrate Christmas Day together at Novotel London West. The annual event is free to attend and includes a two-course lunch, live music and a goodie bag.

Almost one million older people in the UK often feel lonely. While this can be hard to cope with at any time of the year, Christmas can be particularly difficult. The festive period can be a painful reminder of loved ones lost or living far away.

The Big Christmas Day Lunch means that people can choose to enjoy the day with others rather than spending it alone. The event is always very popular. Guests and volunteers dance, chat and form new friendships.

It’s completely free to attend and free transport can also be arranged for those who need it.

Get involved

Attend the lunch

If you or someone you know is interested in joining the Big Christmas Day lunch, you can sign up here. The last day to register is December 10th. To attend, you need to be a resident of Hammersmith & Fulham and either be aged 60+ or referred by one of H&F’s services or charities.

Donate to ensure more people can benefit

It costs around £55,000 to run the event, so it’s only thanks to the generosity of local people and businesses that H&F Council can keep the lunch free to attend. Without these donations, many more people would spend Christmas Day alone and lonely. If you’d like to support the lunch, you can find out more and make a donation here.

Volunteer to help local residents

H&F Council is recruiting volunteers to support the Big Christmas Day Lunch. If you can’t volunteer on the day, there are still plenty of ways to get involved, from filling goodie bags to writing Christmas cards. You can sign up to volunteer here.

People dancing in a circle.

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Volunteering is a way of giving back

Volunteering for the Poppy Appeal

One of our residents, Siobhan, has been volunteering to support her community for more than 15 years.

Volunteers are at the heart of our community, sharing their time and skills to support others and, in turn, gaining new experiences, new friendships and contentment. Around 966,000 people volunteer in London each year. Those aged between 65 and 74 are the most likely to volunteer. Once people have retired from paid work, they often find that they want to continue contributing to their community and now have more time to do so.

One such volunteer is almshouse resident Siobhan, who has been supporting the Chelsea & Kensington branch of the Royal British Legion for 10 years. She finds it immensely rewarding: “Volunteering is a way of giving something back and helping others. It gives one a good feeling.”

For several years, Siobhan took on much of the responsibility for organising the branch’s Poppy Appeal, including managing volunteers and ordering stock, as well as selling poppies herself. She shares, “It ended up taking up a full four months each year. At our busiest times, I’d sometimes leave my home at 8.30am and not get back until 7pm.”

This year, Siobhan has reduced her workload considerably, but she’s still been helping out by packing and selling poppies.

The Poppy Appeal raises around £45-£55 million every year, which the Royal British Legion uses to support thousands of members of the armed forces, including with:

  • Emergency grants, temporary accommodation and other practical support
  • Career advice and training
  • Counselling and wellbeing services
  • Care homes, home adaptations and mobility equipment

None of this would be possible without an army of volunteers across the UK, many of whom have retired from paid work. As well as raising money, Royal British Legion volunteers help to raise awareness. Siobhan shares, “People will stop by the stand and ask questions. They’re often surprised that the Poppy Appeal isn’t just about the World Wars; it’s about supporting all veterans.”

Siobhan wholeheartedly recommends that people consider volunteering. Prior to the Royal British Legion, she supported Crisis at Christmas for five years and found it a “magical, rewarding and gratifying” thing to do. In fact, Siobhan has already found her next voluntary role – supporting patients and staff at Chelsea and Westminster Hospital. She’ll be greeting visitors, running errands and delivering medicine to wards.

Siobhan isn’t the only person at Hammersmith United Charities who enjoys volunteering. Several of our other residents and staff members volunteer regularly or on an ad-hoc basis. Siobhan even persuaded Scheme Manager Chris and Gardener Victoria (V) to sell poppies when she was short of volunteers!


Find out more

The Royal British Legion

The Royal British Legion is always keen to hear from people who would like to volunteer. There are a number of ways to support veterans through the charity, from selling poppies and sorting stock to helping in the office. To find out more, email ChelseaKensington.Chairman@rbl.community

Other ways to volunteer

Hammersmith & Fulham offers hundreds of ways to volunteer for your community. As Victoria Hill, Chief Executive & Clerk to the Trustees at Hammersmith United Charities, says, “Every single one of our grant-holders relies on volunteers in one way or another.”

You could read with childrenserve clients at your local foodbank or help people to manage their finances. Whatever your interests, skills or availability, you’ll find volunteering opportunities by contacting local charities or visiting Simply Connect and Link Up London.

 

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A RENA workshop. Women are sat at a table doing collages.

The RENA Initiative

Creating a safe space for women affected by loneliness and isolation.

While caring for a loved one can be an extremely rewarding experience, it can also be an isolating one. Artist Mellezia channelled those feelings to create The RENA Initiative – a CIC offering free visual arts programmes that create opportunities for people to be connected, empowered and valued.

Mellezia explains, “RENA stands for Recognising, Empowering and Nurturing Artists. Rena is also my mother’s name. She taught me that I could achieve whatever I set my mind to and be whoever I wanted to be. I wanted to be able to share that experience of being nurtured and empowered with others.”

Image shows 20 colourful painted self-portraits

Creative workshops

The RENA Initiative is currently delivering HeArty – a project co-designed with residents – where health and wellbeing practitioners come together with artists to share health education through fun and creative activities. Attendees are older women and women from global majority backgrounds ranging in age from 24 to 86. One participant shares, “There are very few spaces like this one in which, as women, we can be totally free to express ourselves and be at peace with one another. We share many things not only about art but also about our lives and that is very special.”

Tackling isolation

A key aim of The RENA Initiative is to help ease social isolation and loneliness. As one participant shares, “The project has done excellent work to educate me, improve my self-esteem, expose my hidden talent, keep me in touch with the community, gain new friendships and have a better quality of life.”

Empowering women

Mellezia mentors others to lead workshops, set up their own business and develop their project ideas. One mentee shares, “I feel Mellezia has a genuine interest in developing my know-how, best practices, care and attention for these workshops and events, which has boosted my confidence. Even if I were to hit a bump, there is always guidance and support.”

Menopause Awareness Month

This year, as in previous years, October’s HeArty workshop was focused on Menopause Awareness Month. Mellezia explains, “Due to the way that women, especially Black women, have been treated by medical professionals in the past, there’s a resistance to asking for help. It’s really important for me to create safe spaces where the community feel empowered and able to advocate for themselves. This year, we partnered with health coach Lorraine Fontaine of TheWellHealthSpace.com to explore how to support brain health and emotional wellbeing through the stages of menopause. Artist Jenny Bardoville then led a session on neurographic art.”

HUC’s grant

We recently awarded The RENA Initiative a £7,684 grant to support its work. Mellezia says, “We could not afford to provide our services without the help of this grant.

“What I love about HUC is that they are embedded in the community. They invest in grassroots organisations and projects that are important to residents. HUC trust and empower us to deliver our services, and they are accessible if we need support.”

Broadening horizons

“The cost-of-living crisis is massively impacting our community,” Mellezia says. “We provide activities that are fun and free. As well as workshops, we go on monthly outings. This month, we’re going to London Zoo; we’ll have a guided tour of the zoological society library, explore the zoo, sketch some of the animals and enjoy a nice lunch. That is something that would otherwise be completely out of reach for many people.”

The women agree. As one says, “This project has given me the opportunity to visit places I thought was out of my reach. It has broadened my horizon.”

The RENA Initiative has turned into a true tribute to Mellezia’s mother and helped Mellezia to work through her grief at losing her mother, “It helps to keep me going, knowing that something beautiful has come out of such immense loss. It is thriving, it lives on and it’s helping others.”


Find out more

The RENA Initiative’s HeArty workshops and outings both take place once a month on a Thursday. If you’d like to join, email info@therenainitiative.com or visit www.therenainitiative.com

A RENA Initiative workshop. A group of people are holding out their paintings of a leaf.

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